in the bath tub, drinking a tall glass of red wine and thinking to myself...

don't, don't, DO NOT ever let a man come between you and your dreams.

you see her and think oh how well put together she is. so strong, independent, steadfast. but as soon as those doors close it is almost as if the world is shattered and the razors edge looks so much better than a life on its bitter brink of insanity and tears. her legs are long, her hair is braided, and the whole world widens its mouth to welcome her in. but how cruel it can be. even her father does not know her secrets and talents. he will tear her down and widen her soul until it is swallowed by sadness. he does not know her. not one bit. he has never read her words or sewn her thoughts together. he has never once pondered on her beauty or gathered it together for safekeeping.

"Wait, they don't love you like I love you."

Really, most importantly, I am beginning to realize I am thankful for you in my life. Mostly, because you showed me a world of amazing music I never would have known existed.

when are you going to realize it's just that the time was wrong

You should have seen me last night. I swirled myself around this town. And every man begged for me. Oh, do you feel any regret yet? You have lost her. Exploding in hearts.

oh, mystery man.

Where is he? Where is the man that will sweep me off my feet and look adoringly into my eyes. Where is this magic man? It is about time he shows up on my doorstep.

Oh, mystery man. Come here. Come here.

This young woman is tired of crying out her eyes over a man who broke her in two. I want you to be my prince and heal my wounds. Tell me you love me. Adore my sides.

I am pretty sure you are not coming back. And even more sure you are out of my life forever.

With my fingers crossed, I hope I never see you again.

choking on this perception of pain. it seems to be one of those early mornings where the rain comes straight from my eyes. droplets slipping down the sides of my face. furious at the longevity of your sides against my sides. why let the momentum drag on?
i hate the thought. i refuse to remind myself of any nights with you. i hate the thought of you. i hate the selfish evenings.
all of your selfishness so repulsive to the earth. would leave any woman shaking herself up inside.

a man no longer welcome here.

how you left her alone

These days have just been such a ridiculous phase of my life. I have lost all those men, and thankfully, I have lost them. My life was never the best with them, they ate me alive. My spirit ran dry, I lost my sense of direction, lost the creativity and the passion my love always had. Now I must regain it all back.
Even though I feel as if the last three years were entirely lost, they certainly were not wasted. This heart of mine has learned an abundance of life, and has gained intelligence. It has also taught me exactly what I am seeking for in a life long partner. I have my sights set on the bigger and the better things.
My sights set on the future. Thankfully, deep inside, I know I am going to be perfectly fine. But as the moment resides, I cannot help but have quite a bit of pain. I could care less about what you think, truly. I am better off without most of you.
All I want is to fulfill my life until the top is blown off and the skies are painted with my passion, my love, and there are those in the world who sincerely appreciate my beauty. Because, oh my, there is so much beauty inside this young woman. All she is in need of is to suck this earth dry of its soil, getting her hands dirty, muddy, and becoming life changing.
When watching the stars fade, her eyes become fastened on such a beautiful direction in life, so enthralled with hope.
So sorry about it all, but thank you for teaching me how I truly want my life to be lived and how I am no longer taking any chances to lose it ever again.
So many of these men, taking so very much from me, oh, oh oh oh it's all wrong.

Now that it is all over, I thank you.

You will never meet another one like myself.


How you left her alone.